


There's Something I've Been Meaning To Tell You

by ellisly



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Boys In Love, Coming Out, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Light Angst, Light Anxiety, M/M, agatha doesn't know, supportive boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:48:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27854538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellisly/pseuds/ellisly
Summary: I am a sucker for Agatha-doesn't-know-yet fics so I had to write one!Simon is caught more than a little off-guard when he finds Agatha in his flat one morning. Guess he must've forgot she was visiting for the weekend. It wouldn't be a problem other than the fact that Simon has yet to come out to her and that his boyfriend is still sound asleep in his room.In this fic, Simon is seeing a therapist and him and Baz are in a good place, so be ready for fluff and supportive boyfriends!
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 3
Kudos: 94





	There's Something I've Been Meaning To Tell You

**Agatha**

“I can’t believe you took the red-eye,” Penny huffs as we trek up the stairs, my pink suitcase in tow. I tried to take it back from her after she cursed at the broken lift but she insisted, muttering something about being a better host than the others.

Penny’s got her unruly curls tied up into a quick messy bun, as per usual, but it looks as though she’s using the mousse I gifted her for her birthday as her mane seems to be a bit more sleek. I really do think I missed her, despite all the trouble her and Simon gave me during our time at Watford. I guess what they say is true- absence really does make the heart grow fonder. When I called Penny last month to let her know I’d be home in England on Christmas break from USD, she all but shrieked into the phone. She insisted I come and stay at her and Simon’s flat for a couple of night’s, for old time’s sake. 

I can’t say I truly want things to be like they used to be- back to only tolerating Penny, in a stale relationship, constantly having to play the part of damsel in distress. Things are much better the way they are; Penny and I get on much better- skyping and calling from time to time; Simon and I are back to being friends and he was very understanding of me coming out as ace (we still text and call but it’s been a bit awkward, though I can’t place why. However, it’s still loads more pleasant than it was when we were dating); I’ve even found a new passion- I take a martial arts class at school and have gotten quite skilled in self defense moves.

“Sorry Pen, I swear it was the only flight left,” I say as we finally reach Penny and Simon’s door. Morgana, who knew walking up seven flights would be such a trip. Penny jiggles her keys in the lock and opens the door, ushering me inside.

“Oh, it’s no problem really, I just figure you must be exhausted.” Penny sets my bag next to the coat rack, closing the door behind her. She shrugs off her snow-dusted jumper and hangs it next to a familiar looking jacket- Simon’s- and a black dress coat. It’s nice to see Simon’s stepped up style since Watford.

I take in the flat before me. It’s cozy and a bit messy, though much less so than I expected from the likes of Simon and Penny. There’s a soft looking sofa on one side of the room facing the telly mounted on the wall. On the other side is an open kitchen, a dining table set in the middle, and a hall off of the living room. I can easily see touches of Penny throughout- her ever-swirling crystal ball resting on the table, scrunchies hung over the door handle- as well as bits of Simon- dirty adidas’ by the door and framed pictures on the wall. There’s the one of Simon and I at a formal (I still love that picture), one of the three of us spread out on the great lawn, and even one of him and Baz. Baz looks playfully annoyed in it, eyes caught mid-roll, with Simon sitting next to him, smiling and throwing up a pair of bunny ears.

Sometimes, I completely forget about Baz. I know he and Simon have become close since Watford’s whole mess, and that he hangs out with him and Penny all the time, but after I moved, I never really got to talk to him again (though I reckon it’d be a bit awkward, wouldn’t it?). The three of them hardly ever post on socials so I rarely see them together. Penny gripes every once in a while about Baz’s “annoying and constant posh presence” though I can hardly follow along with the maddening pace of her rants. Simon will talk about Baz from time to time or send me snaps of him lounging about, a rare occurrence considering he’s probably still a little weird about the whole ramparts-debacle.

“Settle in Agatha, maybe get some rest while I go ‘round the corner and grab us some coffee and pastries. I doubt Simon will be up any time soon- I heard him come in late last night.”

“Sure, Pen. And thanks again for letting me stay, I’m really excited to be with you all again.” I pull her in for a quick hug. As we part, she smiles up at me, pushing her cat-eye glasses back up her nose

“Of course Agatha, anytime. I’m glad we’re all together.”

**Simon**

I wake up with a piercing headache and a clump of Baz’s hair in my mouth. I groan as I slowly open one eye. I’m in bed, on my back, shirtless, and Baz is draped across me, his head under my chin and snoring soundly. I move carefully so as not to wake my sleeping boyfriend (not that I suspect he’ll wake for hours) and head for the kitchen in search of aspirin.

Last night, Baz and I got well and truly sozzled. His winter term at LSE had just finished up, taking the last of his exams that afternoon. All week he’d been a right mess, up until Crowley knows when studying, hardly eating and only taking breaks when I managed to pull him away for a quick snog or homemade scones, so I decided to take him out for a celebration. We met up with Dev and Niall (they’ve come around to liking me. I think) at a pub near the flat, and, well, the last thing I remember is Baz and I stumbling into my room, him pushing me onto the bed, and, uh, yeah.

God, this apartment is bright, I think as I slowly make my way down the hall, pulling on my favorite of Baz’s football jumpers that I keep here. I blink away the intruding light streaming into the living room and find myself facing Agatha Wellbelove. On my couch. Looking up at me with the beginnings of a bright smile.

“Simon! It’s so good to see you!” Agatha leaps up, arms spread wide, grinning like I haven’t seen her do in years.

“Aggie!” I say, pulling her into a tight hug. She still looks like she did at Watford, pale blonde hair, warm brown eyes, albeit quite a bit more tan. “How long have you been here?”

She breaks away from our hug and falls back onto the couch, tucking one of her long legs underneath her. California certainly has been good to her- she’s more at ease than I’ve probably ever seen her. “Not long. Penny picked me up from the airport about a half an hour ago. She’s gone to get us some breakfast, I think.”

“Well, sorry for missin’ you coming in. I was out late last night and I totally forgot you we’re flying in-”

Fuck.

I forgot Agatha was getting in this morning. I forgot Baz wasn’t supposed to sleep over last night. I forgot I was waiting to tell Aggie about Baz and I dating. I forgot Baz is currently snoring away, dead asleep in my room down the hall.

Fuck.

My sudden panic must be obvious because Agatha brows have drawn up and she looks a little worried.

“It’s fine, Simon, really. Don’t worry about it.”

I swallow. “Right, uh, well, I really need some aspirin so I’m just gonna-” I turn quickly and head off for the bathroom.

Once I’ve locked the door and turned on the tap, I slip my phone out of my pocket and dial Penny.

“Simon!” She answers, much too loud for the liking of my hangover/stress headache. “You’re up earlier than I expected.”

“Pen, we’ve got a problem. A very big problem.” I rush, keeping my voice low and quiet in hopes Agatha doesn’t hear me.

“What are you on about? Is it the goblins again, ‘cause I swear to Stevie-”

“No! I forgot Agatha was coming over this morning and Baz is here. “

I hear Penny grunt on the other end, likely trying to pick up a carton full of drinks while attempting to balance her phone. “So? Just invite him in, tell Agatha he’s here for breakfast.”

“No, Penny, I mean Baz is _here_. In my room, asleep and likely still partially naked.” I whisper-shout.

“Simon!” Penny whines. I nearly picture her pinched face, rubbing her temple in disbelief. “I knew I should’ve reminded you before you left last night.”

“I know, I know, but I just wanted to surprise Baz and then we got a little drunk and you know how Baz gets after he starts drinking-”

“Yes, I know, unfortunately.” She sighs again.

“Pen, this isn’t how I wanted to tell her.” I rasp. I’m more than a little scared at the moment. I didn’t have much of a plan for coming out to Agatha but this certainly wasn’t at all what I expected.

“It’s going to be okay Simon, I think I have a plan.”

**...**

I step out of the bathroom, taking a deep breath trying to compose myself like my therapist and I have been practicing. A panic attack really isn’t what I need right now. I’ve only got a few minutes until Penny gets back to cause the distraction. I walk back into the living room where Agatha is still sitting on the couch, scrolling through her phone.

“Uh, well, I should probably get dressed before Penny gets home. Let me know if you need anything, I’m the last door down the hall.” I say, tugging lightly on the curls behind my ear. I try to keep my voice light and casual but Agatha simply looks up from her phone, quirking her eyebrows up in light confusion while giving me a closed-mouth smile before returning her attention back to Instagram.

I all but run back towards my room. Inside, Baz is still asleep, bare back rising up and down gently as he basks in the morning light. Crowley, if Iwasn;t so damn worried right now, I’d probably crawl back into bed with him, hoping to get some snogging in.

I walk over towards the bed, grabbing and somewhat forcefully shaking his shoulder. Keeping my voice low, I try to wake him up.

“Fuck off, Snow.” Baz groans into the pillow smashed beneath his face, his voice thankfully muffled.

“Baz, seriously get the fuck up. Agatha is here.”

Baz lifts his head up. Even with sleep marks on his cheeks, he still looks fit, the wanker. “Agatha as in Agatha Wellbelove?”

“Yes. She flew in this morning and now she’s in the flat while you’re naked in bed and we’ve conveniently not come out to her yet.”

Baz curses and jumps out of bed, desperately whipping his head around as he searches for his clothes strewn throughout the room.

“Shh!” I whisper again. “She’s on the couch!”

“Fuck, I forgot she was coming. I’m so sorry, Simon.” Baz says, handing my jeans from last night before pulling on his own. “What the hell are we going to do now?”

“It’s okay Baz, I should’ve made sure we were more careful last night and gone to yours.” I reassure him, handing him his now wrinkled button-up. He takes and throws it on (he’s got to be really worried if he’s ignoring the sorry state of his clothes). “Penny and I’ve got a plan.”

Baz quirks his eyebrow, his signature look, as he searches for something to tie his hair back.

“Oh, don’t give me that look.” I say, handing him the elastic I keep on my wrist. “She’s on her way back from the café with breakfast soon and she’s gonna have Agatha help her unpack it all in the kitchen while I sneak you out the front door.

Baz finishes his bun and sighs as he sits back down on our bed. My heart breaks a bit. I don’t want my boyfriend to think I’m hiding him, that I’m ashamed of our relationship. I sit down next to him and reach for his hand. He lets me take it, giving it a quick squeeze and a tight smile.

“I’m sorry Baz, really. I hate having to do this.”

**Baz**

Christ, this boy. Simon Snow still looks a right mess, his golden curls still flattened on one side from a night of deep sleep, those unremarkable blue eyes earnest and sad. Part of me, the part that still feels the deep shame of my father’s disapproval and rejection, wants to walk right of this room, hand in hand with my boyfriend, and kiss him right in front of Agatha. It wants me to be mad at Simon for treating me like a secret. But that part of me is deeply wrong.

Simon and I decided to wait together; we decided after the whole Christmas fiasco, after he was back to feeling more like himself and I had graduated from Watford, that we wanted to tell Wellbelove in person. I didn’t really care, she and I had never truly been close, but to Simon, it would be his first time coming out to someone close to him.

He never had to explicitly tell Penny- she likely suspected we’d had feelings for each other long before we’d ever gotten together. He had no parents or family to tell. But Agatha? Agatha was everything to Simon for such a long time- more than a sister, more than a friend. And even though they’re on better terms with each other than they were a year ago, I think he fears that telling her will mean losing her. 

I know Simon loves me, he’s told me so. He isn’t afraid of loving me or of me loving him. He’s afraid of things changing, of losing those closest to him, of hurting others. It’s the same fear I lived with for years before coming out, the same stupid fear I feel climb back into my chest everytime I have to face my father or another indignant family member who “disapproves of my choices”.

All I can do is be with Simon in this moment, to help him get through this, to support and love him. He’s a bit thick for believing that asexual Agatha Wellbelove will be anything but than supportive, but his anxiety is still warranted.

“Don’t be sorry, Love. It’s okay, really. You want to do this on your terms when you’re comfortable and you deserve to have that chance.”

I see a little bit of the tension release in him as he smiles back at me. I grin back and pull him towards me, plant a soft, loving kiss on his lips.

“I love you,” he says as he pulls away, a barely-there breath only I could pick up.

“I know, you soft numpty,” I laugh. 

Simon gasps in mock amazement, putting a hand to his chest. “I knew you were paying attention during our Star Wars marathon!”

I truly can’t believe I am dating this complete idiot.

There’s a buzz from Snow’s phone on the bed next to us and he takes a break from gloating to pick it up. 

“Penny’s here.”

**…**

Bunce’s much too loud call for Agatha is our cue to start the escape. Simon, quietly slips out of the room and signals for me to follow him. We slink past the bedroom door, then the bathroom, then out the hall and into the living room. 

In the kitchen, Penny and Agatha have their backs to us as they start unboxing. Penny’s talking up a storm, loudly- now’s our chance.

I don’t believe experiencing time in slow-motion is one of the side-effects of my vampiric condition but I swear the next few seconds last me a lifetime.

On the kitchen counter, Agatha phone chimes, a little ring of a bell, a simple text notification. Immediately after, a large whoosh sounds as Simon’s wings explode from his back. Due to my extremely close proximity to his backside, I get knocked in the face by one of his leathery monstrosities and go down. Hard.

Fuck.

I yelp (I am ashamed), Penny shouts, Simon whips around with his hand slapped across mouth, and Agatha gets to take it all in.

Silence quickly fills the flat and we all remain frozen. It would probably be quite comical if this were the set of some sitcom but all I feel is the pain blooming across the right side of my face. Simon is the first to snap out of the trance, kneeling down besides me to get a closer look at my cheek.

“I’m so sorry, Baz! Penny, grab a bag of peas from the freezer.” He shushes, he tries to touch the side of my face and I swat him away.

“It’s fine, I’m fine, Simon. It’ll heal in a second if you’d just calm down.” I move to stand up and make my way towards the kitchen table. I sit down and Penny hands me a bag of frozen peas. I gracefully accept and gingerly apply it to my face, eyeing Agatha as I do so. “Hello, Wellbelove, nice to see you.”

“Uh, hi Baz?” Agatha looks a little dumbstruck and very confused. “What was that?”

“Isn’t it brilliant? Penny perfected this spell to help hide my wings with the ringing of a bell.” Simon says as he pulls out the chair next to me, grinning sheepishly at Agatha.

“It’s brilliant right up until someone’s phone goes off, apparently.” Penny grunts, joining us at the table with a plate full of scones. “I’ll have to see what I can do about that.”

“I’m sorry, Simon, I’ll change my notification alert or something.” Agatha says meekly. 

She takes a seat next to Penny and across from Simon. I feel him stiffen next to me and it takes nearly everything in me not to reach out for his hand. I settle for tapping my foot against his. He bumps me back and I feel a little better. Another awkward silence settles between us.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude,” Agatha starts, tucking a strand of hair behind her ears and turning to me. “But when did you get here? I didn’t hear you come in.”

I’m just about to start spewing some nonsense about inhuman stealth, when Simon pipes up besides me.

“Well, actually-”

**Simon**

Great snakes, my heart feels like it's about to beat right out of my chest (I wonder if Baz can hear it). I swallow, take a deep breath, and push on.

“Well, Aggie, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now. I wanted to wait until I saw you in person and honestly I freak out everytime I think about doing it- anyways, sorry, I’m rambling.” This is going horribly, I think I may pass out.

Baz places his free hand on my knee and sets down his bag of peas to give me a reassuring look. Penny looks tense but us smiling at me too. Agatha looks very confused. I take another deep breath.

“Agatha, I’m queer. And Baz and I are dating, have been for almost a year now.”

A sense of relief washes over me as I finish my sentence. It feels like a weight I didn’t know I was carrying has been lifted and I feel lighter than I have in a long, long time. A sense of apprehension still lingers as I lift my gaze up to meet Agatha’s.

There’s not a single trace of anger or rejection in her face as she reaches across the table to place her hands on top of mine. “Thank you for telling me, Simon. I know how hard it can be to come out to someone- I nearly had a panic attack before I told you I was ace.” She laughs.

I laugh a little too. “I thought I might get sick.”

“I’m so happy for you guys, really.” She says, shifting her gaze to Baz “And I can’t believe Penny’s gone this whole time without saying something- a whole year!”

“Hey!” Penny interjects “I can keep a secret when needed.”

We all start laughing together. I take a second to bask in the moment- of being with my closest friends, the people I love most in the world, feeling nothing but joy. Baz looks over at me with a mid-giggle smile and I lean over to press a quick kiss to his cheek- I can’t help it.

“Hey, you guys promised me no PDA in the common spaces!” Penny whines.

“Wait, you guys still haven’t explained what Baz was doing here. Do you live here too?” Agatha asks, reaching for a scone (I think she’ll be disappointed- they aren’t a fraction as good as Cook Pritchard’s).

I feel a blush bloom across my cheeks as I turn towards Baz.

“To be quite honest, Wellbelove,” Baz says, hiding his embarrassment unsuccessfully behind an air of nonchalance, “Simon and I got pissed last night and forgot you were arriving this morning, meaning I was rudely awakened by my very frantic boyfriend much too early.”

“Ahh, I see.” Agatha winks at the both of us and I think I die a bit inside. “I expect you two boys to stick to Penny’s PDA rules this weekend, I don’t need to walk in on any of your snogging sessions, thank you very much.”

As everyone erupts into more laughter, I try desperately to hide my face in Baz’s shoulder. “Kill me now.”

Baz just keeps on laughing, taking a moment to kiss curls.

**...**

Later that night, after everyone heads to bed (Agatha gives me a sly wink before setting in which I don’t appreciate in the slightest), Baz and I find ourselves face to face in bed.

As I sleepy play with his fingers, pressing a kiss to each of his finger pads, I thank him for supporting me earlier.

“Of course, Love. I’ll always be there for you.” he whispers, bringing his forehead to mine.

I fall asleep happier than I ever have that night, knowing without a doubt in my mind that I am loved.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I originally wrote this fic back in August, before I left for college and came out to a couple of my close friends. It was just something I jotted down on notes during my free time at work and never had any intention of typing up and posting. But in the past couple weeks, a lot has motivated me to finish it and share it with you guys.
> 
> (spoiler alerts for spn) The main thing was, and don't judge me here, was the ending of Supernatural. SPN was my first venture into the realm of fandoms, fics, and fanart- a huge part of my life now. After years of watching the show, I stopped, believing I would never get to see a happy ending for the two of my favorite characters- Dean and Cas. As soon as I got wind of Cas's confession, though, I was sucked back in, filled with hope for a queer storyline I so desperately needed at the time. Needless to say I was gutted after the ending- not only was Cas virtually nonexistent, Dean's entirely character arch was shattered by a fucking nail. I felt forgotten and way to emotionally invested in a historically shitty TV show.
> 
> What I realized after a day or two after the ending was that despite erasure of one of the most promising queer ships out there, queer stories with happy endings still existed. Not every ship I had invested a lot of my love into ended with the played out "bury your gays" trope. I still had the likes of Carry on, Schitt's Creek, Adventure Time, and so many more. I could still continue to put my faith in media that gave queer couples the endings they deserve, I could still write my own stories.
> 
> During Thanksgiving break, I also came out as queer to some people very close to me. I've yet to come out to my family still, but the relief I felt telling someone from my hometown was immense. I really tried to channel my feelings through Simon's coming out in this one.
> 
> Wow! Sorry for that feelings dump lol. Anyway, I hope ya'll enjoyed this one as much as I did. I had a blast writing it and am so psyched to share it! Thanks for all the love <3


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